What To Wear For Dinner Without Looking Vulgar

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It’s the first date, and you want to leave a good impression on him. You want to show that you’re classy and a woman of high-caliber. Perhaps he is the man of high status that you want to impress – without giving it all away and showing him that you’ve thought this outfit through in every little detail…

In a society where women get slut-shamed for anything, we have to, unfortunately, be very conscious of our clothing. What you wear is kind of “who you are,” even if that’s not entirely true. But in our world, that’s how it works. So we need to be smart and strategic. Going on a first date with a man that matters have to be very thought through, you can’t just quickly grab the first best thing in your wardrobe – men are very visual and people are wired to be judgemental.

(This outfit is perfect. While the dress is “short”, it is covered on the chest, and the flared hem gives a flirty appearance. A perfect mix for a first dinner date)

One of my hobbies is to “pick men’s brain” and understand how they think. I’ve been lucky to encounter many men who have opened up to me on so many topics, giving me amazing juicy content to write about – but one topic that is extremely interesting to look at is what women wear and the male perspective.

You see, I’ve discovered through my male research is that men have A LOT of opinions on what women wear. You might think they don’t have a clue because they are not fashionistas themselves, but they actually do! Men describe how off-putting it is when women try too hard and dress vulgar. They find it a general rule than a rarity. They also told me that it’s never nice when women try to complicate their outfits too much by being “super fashionable”. It seemed like what mostly made them tick was a combination of classy, femininity and style. They want to be next to a woman they can feel proud of after all. Style and class will give just that; the feminine touch is more for the sexual spark.

Short dresses can be worn on first dates! If only they are not bandage models and very fitted. Leave some mystery behind!

There are so many great inspirational role models that are feminine and that I know would look amazing on a first date. Monica Belucci, Audrey Hepburn, Sophia Lorén, Amal Clooney and so on… A little something for any taste, not all women are shaped the same and have the same attributes; it’s important to find out what works for you and what takes out your most confident self.

In the end, what makes a man tick, is confidence. Putting the femininity and classiness aside, they want energy that will make them want more. Confidence is just that (as long as you don’t become full of yourself). The right outfit will give you that confidence where you feel like the best version in your clothes, ready to conquer and leave an impact on any man! Perhaps some have to come from the mental attitude too, but clothes help a long way I must say!

So what to wear on a dinner date?

The key points:

Obviously, you don’t showcase boobs, bums, and an excessive amount of skin, that will just give the wrong impression. But this information is so elementary…

Avoid super fancy clothing, being overly dressed up, anything that makes it look like you’ve been trying too hard. The complicated fashion look should be left for your lunch with the girls!

Don’t come too conservative either. The mother Teresa look is not sexy, and it feels a bit too staged, almost like you’re trying too hard prooving something you’re not.

The color red signals passion and men tend to love it! 

What to do instead?

  • Embrace your femininity, be sexy and more innocent and cute than being provocative and aggressive.
  • If you have a strong personality, then wearing something neutral and conservative is of benefit. If you’re the opposite (shy, laidback and timid) then going a little bit bolder in your outfit could give that perfect balance to your appearance.
  • It’s important to leave a little bit of flirtation in your apparel, but it has to be tasteful and not carry the main focus.
  • Wear a dress or a skirt for the occasion; trousers can easily come across masculine unless you are savvy with your styling.
  • Since it’s an evening occasion (and I’m assuming you are going to a nice restaurant), you want to dress up rather than dress down. (If you are being invited to a more casual outing, then perhaps you should ignore these pictures for reference).
  • Wear something you honestly feel comfortable in. You don’t need to be a psychic to see if someone is not 100% at ease and it might reflect on the date, making it awkward in some ways.
  • Depending on who the man is, of course, the clothing can vary. If the jet-set man you’re going to meet is more hippie/ boho/rock’n’roll / trendy/ hipster/hip-hop type of style etc., many of these outfits might not work for him. The point is not to be a doormat and only please the man, but to find a balance between what is YOU you and what makes him tick. Always dress in a way that you feel is your style and work around the rest. Finding a middle way is usually very successful!
  • If you really feel like you’re struggling, then “the little black dress” is a safe bet, and what I personally used on most of my first dates. You can never go wrong and be neutral enough to be of “anyone’s” liking!

Here are some outfits I think are very “date proof” meaning you can’t go wrong wearing something of this kind. Most of them carry a good mix of feminine/ relaxed/chic and classy vibe, which will leave a positive impression on any man! But don’t forget, you can never be really certain a man will like your outfit, but you can higher the odds of wearing something generic which is in line with your personal style…

The colour of passion – Red again, plus a covered chest and a beautiful skirt giving it a feminine feel.

Another dress that can be shorter if it’s not very fitted and a little bit more covered. But don’t sit in her pose though, it gives away too much legs! 

Perhaps not the sexiest shoes, but the dress is feminine and beautiful to look at. Very figure flattering!

Alaia or Alaia inspired dresses (see also Skater dresses) are great for first dates!

Another Skater dress variation, with long sleeves but shorter skirt that gives a little but keeps some to the mystery.

Dresses with a “flow”, light materials and “chiffon” style will always work because they feel very “romantic”.

Classy, subtle colour and neutral type of dress. Not too sexy, not too conservative, just perfect yet fashionable!

This is a perfect and relaxed dress for a dinner date. You give a little bit of leg or cleavage without giving away more than just that. Very classy and works on all body shapes!


About Author

Anna Bey is the founder of JetsetBabe and School of Affluence - and online educational platform helping women achieve elegance and get an affluent life. Visit SchoolOfAffluence.com for more info! P.S Don't miss her Youtube channel & Instagram.


  1. I like that you mentioned classic icons: Hepburn, Loren, Clooney and especially Belluci. She is sadly under-rated but a classic European beauty. Thank you for the article.

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