Wednesday, November 13

The Socialite world

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During my travels in Asia, I met once an interesting woman when I stayed at the Four seasons hotel. She was apparently a regular in their hotel bar, and so was I that particular week.

As I entered the bar I noticed it was fully seated. I was on my own and wanted to have my usual afternoon drink: Apperol Spritz. I asked the waiter if there were any seats available but instead out of the blue a woman who was sitting alone around a table for four said “You can sit with me”.

She was drinking vodka on the rocks and had smoked probably half of her packet of cigarettes in one sitting. I thanked her for offering and sat down.

We started talking and she was very lovely. Not only that, but she was actually quite interesting. Sometimes it happens that you click immediately with a person and can open up to him or her pretty much straight away.

So we spoke about life. About men. About tears and sorrows and so on. We had drinks after drinks, smoked way too many cigarettes. I asked her why she was drinking vodka on the rocks at 3pm on a monday, she answered because she had to go home and deal with her 7 year old daughter afterwards. – You don’t have a nanny? I questioned her.

– Yes, but it’s not enough darling.

She then turned around to the waiter and asked him about her vodka on the rocks she had ordered 15 minutes ago.

– Madam, it’s in front of you, he politely answered and took a step back.

She looked at an empty glass and started laughing. – Ha ha, did I finish it already? I didn’t even notice…

We exchanged numbers and stayed in touch for the remaining days I was visiting. Frankly, I don’t know what it was that made us connect, but I felt a sad energy in her that I couldn’t let go off.

If I would to try and describe her, I would say she was a typical socialite woman in her early 40’s. Beutiful and very elegantly dressed. I still keep seeing her in many magazines on the events pages of all the galas and charitys she attends in Asia. I remember one time we spoke on the phone after an event she had been to and she started telling me how she hated all of it.

I got surprised, because I couldn’t understand why someone who seem to have event-attending almost as her full-time job, hated it so much? Why else would she do it?

In her words she said: “Sometimes you just gotta do it for many reasons. It’s all about keeping an appearance. A mask. It’s all so fake but all so necessary in this world. I just take a few Xanax before, a vodka and then I’m fine. But do I enjoy it? No, not really…”

In a way it felt a bit cliché, almost like in a movie. “The poor rich woman who’s life seems so perfect is in reality totally miserable”. But then I realised, that in this world we have everything; We have the happy jet-setters, but we also have the sad ones. There is no rule that every Jetset Babe live a happy and fulfilling life, neither does it apply that everyone in this world is just keeping a facade, they are pretending it’s all so perfect when in reality it’s not.

One thing we should keep in mind, that the jet-set world has a different social code from the “real world” in terms of what’s acceptable, what’s not, how one should be etc. There are many unwritten rules and pressure around, which makes people who are not mentally fit take on a destructive approach.

The world of socialites is not all glitz and glam, but instead a lot of politics and gossiping. I think many people don’t feel comfortable being themselves in this environment, and that’s what my new friend was referring to that she always had to wear a mask.

People need to act fake because of politics. Although going on social events is considered a fun thing, it’s all about business, networking or raising your status by climbing the social ladder. Basically to go there and to be seen. To show off yourself and what you have accomplished.

Imagine having this is as a big part of your life, it will become stressful. Almost like an obsessing game.

But a lot of people still do it. Because they have to (pressure from the spouse or family for example) or because they tried it out once and got addicted to the kicks of what the “social climbing game” gives you. (Let’s not get in to the psychological effect of it).

I guess after getting to know Mrs. X, made me really understand that the creme de la creme world of socialites (you can’t go higher than this status wise in the jet-set world) as glitzy as it seems, is tough as hell! Question is, is it really worth it? For what? What does one get out of it? There is no real prize once you reach the top, so why bother? It’s all a game similar to Farmville or Candy crush, in reality you just waste your time on something that makes you addicted.

Would you want to become a socialite and join their exclusive society?


About Author

Anna Bey is the founder of JetsetBabe and School of Affluence - and online educational platform helping women achieve elegance and get an affluent life. Visit for more info! P.S Don't miss her Youtube channel & Instagram.


  1. If that lady had a choice do you think she would choose to be an ordinary woman with a boring job struggling to pay the bills?. No i dont think that….she loves the money she loves her status and she is welling to pay the price. Nobody in this world can be forced to do something. Anyway. I love your posts Jetsetgirl

  2. So happy to see you’re creating lots of intriguing content at the moment. Seems like you’ve got your gear back on again. Keep up the good work! I was fearing your blog would turn into something very superficial after you announced you would concentrate on the jetset stuff and not so much self improvement/motivation etc. but I’m so glad to see you manage to bring in your depth even in these seemingly superficial topics. You’re still your original self who puts in a lot of thought in what you’re creating. xx

    • Thank you so much Ellie for your kind comment. I’m really happy to read your words and feel the support that what I’m doing is appreciated.
      When I said it would be superficial, I guess I meant this blog would be more strictly about the jet-set topics rather than off-topics like self-improvement. However all those topics will soon be up on my new personal blog that I’m currently building (with my own photos!! 😀 ) hugs xxx

  3. Interesting post. I didn’t understand though what is so difficult about facing your 7 years old daughter that it makes you drink vodka?..

  4. I feel sorry for her and her mentality. But I feel even more sorry for the child, especially at such a crucial time in human development (experiences now can/will shape her for life). A nanny should really only be an aide, supplemental to your own parenting. The fact that asking if she had a nanny was your first question is intriguing and maybe (emphasis on maybe) provides insight into your upbringing.

    *Not saying there is anything wrong with having a nanny as extra help can be so welcome to working parents and some don’t have a parenting instinct. I had one for the shortest time but I was a twin. 😉

    Lastly, you say we all have choices. That is very true. But it can be hard for some to feel sorry for another who makes the same choices and continues to cry about it. (I easliy feel sorry for everyone who’s not happy though, haha!) My mother always says, “Part of life is about having and fixing problems! Only a dead person can’t have or do either!” There are your choices.
    I hope she makes some choices that will make her happy. Everyone at least deserves that. 🙂

  5. I would love to have a search box on

    I would appreciate “search this website” or a simple search box in order to find old posts with matching keywords.

  6. Great story on society life and the pressure of keeping up the lifestyle. I just found Diala Makki blog thanks to the story; thank you so much she is amazing!!!!


  7. I think you should change friends or the things you get impressed by. She complains about how fake all people arre, while admitting that she herself is being fake (?!?! WTF?!?!). It depènds on you what you are going to communicate about or do you even communicate or just do bla-bla-talking. Iºve been among people of showbusiness, businessmen and so on and I always talk profoundly with people, no matter what their position in society is. They are always telling me that they rarely can talk this way and about these things with other people so I guess it all depends on what you are able to ¨get out¨ from a person. If you are superficial, your conversations will be superficials. If you already know people, their stories and so on and people already make you bored, you just stop socilizing that much and do other stuff. If you are intelligent enough, you would know what you like to do instead of just complaining about how borring is that you ¨have to do¨ this. You would stay home, read a book or ¨indulge¨ to some creativity things. And most of all – if one is intelligent enough he wouldnºt like to waste his life, he would appreciate his own time and not waste it because of what somebody would say or think. Thatºs about friends like yours.

    • I do not really think being less fake necessarily improves one’s life quality. With a lot of people it is just better to keep things superficial.

      There is only a very small amount of people, which are actually good as friends and worth of spending time with.

  8. Tell your friend that if she wants to see changes in the world/ her world, shw might start with changing herself or better said – her altitude. Is she is herself instead of fake, if she opens her heart, she probably will get the same. Tell her to not just wait for other people to change, but to try to bring something different out of them. 😉

  9. I can understand her completely on

    I understand her very well. From perspective of many people my life is awesome and looks really good on the outside. Rich husband, both have top education, tons of designer crap, can travel a lot abroad in 5 star hotels, good career so far, I also look good, tons of nice clothes and a nice large own home (we own the apartment) in a capital city of EU country. Meeting interesting upper class people.

    However, despite of all this I am often so bored with everything, even though I really do not have much reason to be bored. Nowadays, I am even too lazy to shop. I can completely imagine that someone much wealthier than us would feel exactly the same. I personally know many in top 5% most earning EU citizens, but quite many of them are so done with 1 or more aspects of their life. Majority of them are not so much into these “social games”, but occasionally have to participate because of a job etc.

    Money does not really change your life that much in the end, unless you have billions on your bank account and you can completely retire work life. Anyway, I think her friend naturally loves being rich, because it is much nicer to be a rich and bored person – than a poor and bored person.

    I have been quite poor at one point when I was a student and honestly, I would not be able to deal with it any longer.

    • Like Jordan Belfort said in his autobiography-“There is no nobility in povertt. I have been a poor man, and I have been a rich man. And I chose rich every fucking time.” 😀

  10. poverty can have its own special kind of glamour, at least when yo uare young…
    i think there are lots of happy jetsetters but they are able to play the game and still have real friends alongside of it.

  11. Thank you for giving me this perspective, is also about what do we really want, not about what is better o higher, we must to be honest with ourselves first.

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