Graciousness is marked by manners, delicateness, and generosity of spirit. A woman abundant in inner beauty is also abundant in graciousness. She makes people feel at ease and is the very definition of kindness and consideration.
With brash talking and expressing one’s opinions, graciousness has become a rather obsolete notion these days.
How do we then practice such as a quality?
1. Think 3 times
Think three times before you speak in all texts and online messages. If your words can be misinterpreted, they will be. Therefore, it’s better to err on the side of caution and re-word potentially controversial words or phrases.
2. No judgement or superiority
Throw out judgement or any air of superiority. A gracious woman understands that people come from different backgrounds, perspectives, and experiences. She is open and does not think ill of others if they look different or have less money or education.
3. No one perfect
Understand that no one is perfect. The opposite of showing graciousness is to be demanding. A gracious woman allows for others’ mistakes. She overlooks minutia such as her partner’s funny choice in shoes or the fact that someone’s apartment is a little messy.
The lady forgives. Similar to understanding that no one is perfect, a gracious woman does not harbor resentment. If someone has offended her, she makes the necessary steps to either confront the offender assertively or deals with the issue in her own private way. After taking the appropriate steps and allowing her emotions to ride, she moves on.
5. Keep negative opinions to yourself
If it’s not nice, she doesn’t say it aloud. I knew a woman who felt all her opinions were fact, even the unkind ones. She would say “that is a bad photo” of someone’s favorite photo. Or she would say “you don’t cook well,” thinking that she was being helpful. A gracious woman is the opposite of this. She does not assume that her negative opinion is the truth. For the most part, she keeps her mouth shut. Especially if it will hurt the other person.
6. She takes the high road
If someone is mean to you, you can repay them by being just as nasty. However, the best thing to do is to calm down. Ask yourself, “What is the classiest thing to do?” Once you know what it is, take a deep breath, and then do it. Many times the high road would be to ignore an act of spite or to be kind in return.
Graciousness, as in many inner beauty qualities, requires self-discipline. It is not easy to put into practice. You must pause and think about what you are saying and doing. For you to be a better person requires patience and practice.
A final word:
Don’t be too hard on yourself if you’re not perfect, and certainly don’t be too self-critical.
If you want to be gracious to others, be gracious to yourself first!
Hanifa Yip is a holistic health coach and registered nutritionist with over 20 years of certified teaching experience in fitness. She has recently authored a book for women entitled Healthy with Hanifa: A Woman’s Guide to Holistic Health & Fitness, which is available for purchase on Amazon US, UK, Canada, and Australia.
Hanifa is also a moderator for the “How to be a Lady” Facebook group where she posts daily on topics such as class, style, etiquette, and all other issues related to being a lady. She is excited and honoured to be a regular contributor on Jetset Babe, and looking forward to writing articles on fitness, nutrition, and a lady’s lifestyle.