Confidence is one of the leading ingredients to becoming an elegant lady. I’m referring to the elegant lady who achieves her goals and gets what she wants. She gets into high society and elevates her network. Far too many ladies get their foot in, but never get further than just circulating in that environment. They never reap the many benefits that this world has to offer.
Today, I want to touch on the topic of confidence and body language.
There are two sides of the coin that must get acknowledged.
- The traditional “classy” traits that make a lady more feminine but quite submissive.
- The aggressive go-getter lady, who is overly confident but on doesn’t come across as very elegant or classy.
The formula that we’re after is to mix these two, because then you get the perfect blend of Classy & Confident.
So how can you be a confident lady while still looking elegant without scaring others off?
You can’t ignore the essence of confidence.
Confidence is what will get you noticed, it is what will give you credibility and what will provide you with status. If you’re overly confident, you’ll end up as a dominant and aggressive woman that pushes people away.
It’s therefore important to mix confidence and femininity. This subtle confidence is what classy women get just right!
I will give you some ideas on how you can adopt this.
Smile, but don’t overdo it
Being positive is a sign of good manners and politeness. Classy ladies don’t have a frown on their face. It’s rude, and it won’t bring anything good into your life.
Smiling can be a powerful tool for becoming likable and for attracting the opposite sex. If you overdo it, it might signal insecurity and instead become a credibility robber. You won’t appear confident, and it will also lower your status as a high-value lady.
Be a happy person, smile and enjoy life. Be aware that in certain social situations, it might not work in your favour if you smile too much.
Strong voice, without being loud
People who are not confident speakers should do elocution training. The way we speak is a big part of our body language and the impression we leave on people. Sometimes it’s not really what we say, but how we say things.
Your tone of voice is what showcases your confidence. Insecure people often have a weaker or irregular pitch. Confident people speak strongly and clearly.
It’s important to have a strong voice, but it doesn’t mean it has to be loud. Once loudness comes into play, that’s when we get those aggressive and dominant traits we don’t want to have as classy ladies.
We want to remain feminine with soft and sweet voice. Such a voice can be presented in a strong and confident way without losing the feminine, seductive trait.
You need to work on being assertive with your communication. Mix that together with a pleasant tone and moderate volume, and you will get it just right!
Be calm & contained
Since women are emotional creatures by nature, it’s easy for us to become overly expressive when we are emotional. It might easily overwhelm our audience, especially men.
Always take a deep breath and don’t get carried away in emotions. Your focus should be on appearing calm and contained, as that signals power and is very elegant.
Classy ladies always have contained body movements and are never the ones who are “all over the place.” If you’re someone who’s struggling with this, you need to become aware of situations when you get emotional and carried away. Collect yourself and take a step back until you feel capable of handling the situation more calmly.
Cultivate a steady handshake
Have you ever experienced a weak handshake and it made you think twice about that person? Both men and women can have weak handshakes and that signals their confidence levels.
Cultivating a steady handshake doesn’t mean you have to shake hands like a strong man. You just have to be firm enough to signal confidence and status. You can still do this while being feminine and ladylike.
Physically, make yourself bigger
People with low confidence tend to make themselves smaller without even noticing. They pull in their bodies, minimize their size, instead, they should be opening up and taking up space.
This is why it’s important to analyse the way you carry yourself.
A lot of us make the common mistake of overdoing it and adopting a masculine body language. It will indeed make you look confident and powerful, but it will also reduce your femininity!
Try this for a confident yet elegant body language:
- Open up the chest, make the neck long and stand tall. This will give away an assertive yet elegant energy.
- Maintaining eye contact is very important.
- Use those calm and contained body movements in combination with this. It will add a lot of elegance.
Be selective with your nodding and head tilts
It’s a female gesture to nod or tilt your head when listening to someone. We do it because we want to show that we’re listening, agreeing and encouraging someone to speak.
However, it can make a person look too agreeable and submissive.
If you want to project power and authority, you should minimize this gesture and keep your head more straight up and neutral. This position will always look more elegant, as anything overly expressive reduces the classiness. This will help you become a high-value lady.
This topic is fascinating and is a must to master for anyone who wants to become more confident or reduce their aggressive traits.
None of us are born perfect, and there is always room for improvement. It’s never too late to start making a change! Anyone can upgrade their lives and transform themselves into a woman of high-value and status, you just need the right tools and knowledge!Join my community of likeminded women who are on a mission of transformation!
When I was younger my confidence depended on how I was dressed. If I wasn’t dolled up you would notice an immediate change in my behavior (hiding, frowning, fast paced walking). Another point that resonated was the “smilng but not overdoing it”. There are too many times I could count of moments I’ve been surrounded around girls who had very strong personalities and I always remembered smiling like a chesscat to keep them neutral. It became mandatory that I stop myself from displaying this false sense of niceness which only led to years of bullying and lack of respect from my peers.
Now that I respect myself confidence became water under the bridge!